The Flash #339 - You Sure B.S. Doesn't Stand for Bullshit?

Anyway, after another interlude, we see the bad guys scouring the city trying to track down the Flash so they can sic Big Sir on them. While Jester and Captain Boomerang fly about the city, Mirror Master sets up a giant Parabolic mirror to watch a section of the city like he's some convenience store clerk that's suspicious of teenagers shop lifting all the time.

And well, if you didn't find this display all that noticeable, the Weather Wizard if following B.S. around keeping him covered with a giant rain cloud that is pouring rain only on Dufus.

"Now if I can just tilt this thing the right way, I can start frying cars in the street!"

See, the group doesn't want to be noticed until they find the Flash, and apparently covering their secret weapon in a small self contained rain storm that only rains on said secret weapon is a way to remain inconspicuous.

Wouldn't it be easier to get your heroes attention by maybe, I don't know, attacking the city so he finds out about you sooner and comes to stop you? I mean, isn't trying to find him and keeping a low profile just a waste of time? Apparently not, and well it serves as good filler for what is really the plot to this story (which is apparently the court case against the Flash, and some clues to what eventually will be Crisis on Infinite Earths)

Anyway, eventually Captain Cold finds the Flash first and attacks the scarlet speedster to keep him in one area. With the Flash spotted, the bad guys decide it's time to get things started. They let the rain cloud disappear. While Captain Cold assaults Flash with icicles (and Flash assaults the reader with bad puns) the Weather Wizard pisses off Big Sir even more by showing him a picture that he claims is proof that after B.S. buried his "little friend" Flash went along and desecrated the grave and took the body.

This gets Dufus so worked up he attacks the Flash with his ball and chain. Apparently when he uses his ball and chain it turns into an energy weapon which doesn't really harm the Flash overly much.

The story ends with Flash trying to get away from the barrage of the energy balls by vibrating through a wall into a building to get some time to think of a strategy. But apparently the Flash doesn't have the sense to get far enough away from the wall, because Dufus punches him out through it and then flies away somewhere where he can punish the Flash for hurting his "little friend."

No way anybody will see this guy coming!

The villains believe they have won, and the story ends with an unimpressive cliffhanger.

Needless to say, I don't feel really impressed with the outcome of this issue, and I could care less if Flash got his ass kicked by this guy. In fact, you know he would deserve it for allowing himself to be so easily defeated by such a shitty character. Dickhead.

This concludes this edition of Fucking Comics. If you want to go and get yourself this issue of The Flash, to my better knowledge it has not been reprinted. But since it's not something that probably nets a whole lot of cash in resale value, I'm sure you can find it in the local back-issue bargain bin of a fine comic book shop that's trying to offload their worthless inventory at a buck an issue.

He seems pretty smug for a guy who once got his ass kicked by the Quik Bunny
This is probably how the mind of a Furry works.
Isn't that wall a bit too thin to be supporting a building? With jokes like that I'm fucking GLAD they killed you in Crisis.

 

 

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