 How To Insult Comic Book Readers in 8 Pages or Less!
Back in the early days of the "Bronze Age" of Comics (That would be anything printed after the sixties for those who don't give a rats ass about fancy titles like a bunch of undersexed Star Trek fanatics) There was a time when comic companies took pride in seeing how far they can go without their faithful readers knowing that their intelligence had been insulted.
Today's example is an old issue of Action Comics Weekly printed in 1988 (Issue #607) printed by DC Comics who prides themselves on writing hero books that are totally detached from the consequences of reality (Well until recently any way.. Read anything from 1939 to 1998 or so and you'll know exactly what I'm talking about)
You may find the title familiar, it's now presently one of the core Superman titles, which just goes to show that putting one of your most popular characters in as many redundant titles that don't sell often works (See Batman, Spider-Man and anything that starts with X)
Back in it's glory days in 1939, Action Comics started off as the birthplace of Super-Man but soon evolved into a showcase of various characters and stand alone story arcs. It soon became a weekly title and then finally returned to being a core Super-Man title along with Supes' other titles (Umm let's see there's Superman, Superman: The Man of Steel, Superman in Action Comics, The Adventures of Superman, Superboy every now and then, and of course there are always three or four Superman limited series that "reinvent" old concepts or "give a new dimension to the character" that run every six months.)
Issue #607 was one of the Weekly titles that showcased a number of DC's... Oh, how the fuck can I even try to make this civil?.... er.. Lesser known characters, as well as some of the "big names" of the franchise to lure in unsuspecting readers who just HAVE to have EVERY Superman story, no matter HOW stupid or short.
This issue stands as a testament on how a comic team (or a group of them) can totally insult your intelligence (and con you out of $2.00.. Which was the cover price in Canadian dollars back then... So that's about a $6.00-10.00 cover price today, depending on the grade of paper used.)
This issue features stories staring the Green Lantern (Hal Jordon), Deadman, Superman (meaning $$$ raked in just printing his name on the cover.), The Secret Six (Shhhh! They're a secret!), Wild Dog (A cheesie Punisher rip off), and Blackhawk (One of DC's old war time titles that eventually ended up getting nixed when people decided spandex is the only thing you can have in comics back in the late 60's.)
Let me break down these stories, and as I go along I'll point out all the stupid stuff, swear a little, and make a funny comment or two, because let's face it, you don't really give a flying fuck about an old issue of Action Comics Weekly you just want me to shut up already and make with the yuks.
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